An Inspector Calls.

To put your foot in it once is careless, to do so twice in a day is bordering on criminal. But today, I managed it.

Firstly strolling along one of the many delightful green lanes that criss cross this part of the Peak District, I came across a 4×4 parked at the side of the road. My first reaction was that there were men with dogs about, up to no good, worrying the local wildlife.

Closer examination however revealed a middle aged lady asleep in the drivers seat. She seemed in a very deep sleep.

So of course rather than walk away and leave the good lady in the land of nod, I had to knock on the window and make sure she was alright.

She was. I need not have bothered she assured me, but thanked me for making sure she was alright. Lilly the Collie kept leaping up and trying to peer into the drivers cabin. Then she barked. And this set off the middle aged lady’s dog, that had been resting in the back of the pick up.

I beat a hasty retreat, she fired up her engine and roared off down the lane.

Never mind. I was only being a good citizen.

Later that afternoon I popped out to do some shopping. This tends to prove expensive, as I am always now, alone and without a leader, and have forsaken the shopping list, preferring to rely on my memory. Well I never used to look at it anyway and even if I did happen to glance at it as I struggled past the cheeses, I could not read my writing.

Anyway as I idled my way up to Waitrose, I noticed an middle aged chap in shorts and a tee shirt clutching a rucksack shuffling along in the stores general direction.

I could have walked on by. I could have said nothing. I should have.

Instead I said, “wow you must have completed one hell of a walk.”

Then I smiled at him as only one long distance path walker can to another long distance path walker.

Apparently he had had to have two new hips and knees which explained the shuffling walk and yes he still liked walking and the rucksack was to put the little bit of shopping in that he could manage to carry. He advised me against new knees. Hip replacements are ok. Knees don’t work out quite so well.

Later I was in the shower, enjoying the feel of the hot water massaging all the tensions of the week away. Lilly started barking. I shouted at her to stop. She continued.

Convinced that this was another of her barking wind ups I ignored her. The barking continued and in fact got more intense.

Reluctantly I stepped out of the shower and grabbed a towel. Reaching my bedroom window I looked out. The gate was open and by leaning a little further out of the window, I could see a police man knocking on the front door.

I had been rumbled.

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